Monday, December 18, 2006

I Don't Like Surprises

Like Holyfield when Tyson bit his ear off...like K-Fed when he got Britney's text...like the US Navy at Pearl Harbor...like Geraldo Rivera at Al Capone's Vault...like Macualay Culkin at Michael's after drinking some "Jesus Juice"...and like Faith Hill at the CMA's...I don't like fucking surprises!

I'm a type "O", or "A", or "green", or "blue", or "ENTJ", or whatever the fuck label they're putting on people that like to plan ahead. Probably that's why I'm really nervous right now. I have no idea what to plan for or what I even want. I'm the kind of person who is always living in the future instead of the present. Even when I'm doing fun things, I'm always thinking about what I want to do next. For me, it's all about looking forward to something.

In high school, it was always the next test result or the next school dance (lame, I know). In college it was always getting a degree and making money. But, now in the working world, there's nothing more than putting in my 40 a week and paying bills.

I've got to mix things up. Things need to be exciting again. Weekends need to be the reward at the end of each week. How can I do that? Isn't that what everyone wants? No more talking to my friends on Monday morning about what they did all weekend and the unanimous response is "nothing." I've decided that I'm going to spearhead the effort to at least try to make lives exciting again. I'm thinking poker nights, video game nights, drinking game nights, movie nights, BBQ's, trips to Tahoe, bowling, pool, clubs, bars, sports games, casinos, beaches, tennis, snowboarding, and maybe even a little game called 7-minutes in heaven (just kidding).

I'm going to have to name myself Social Chair and get everyone together to have fun with their lives. When I was in high school, people always said "cherish it, because this the best time of your life." When I was in college, people changed their minds and said "this will be the best time of your life." Well, fuck that, THIS should be the best time of my life. I finally have money to be able to do whatever the hell I want and a place to do it in. I can go and do whatever I feel like doing without answering to anybody else or having to explain myself.

If I keep being passive and just going with the flow I'm going to end up as an old man who just locks himself in his room and hangs out with his 14 cats while playing World of Warcraft and talking to his computer that he named "Blinky" because of the LED on the front that talks to him in morse code and sends him messages about how to defeating the Red Dragon will cure world hunger. I don't want that.

If YOU don't want that, call me up if you're doing a whole lot of "nothing." I'll call everyone else. We'll kick it...nobody will get 14 cats or take orders from inanimate objects like "Blinky."

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